This MBP, as battered as my favorite cowboy boots but far from being my favorite as I have no other, keeps telling me that I do not have enough memory, my scratch disks are full, blah blah blah. As I sit here listening to my playlist composed of Jason Mraz, Ray LaMontage, Bon Iver, Nouvelle Vague, Pete Yorn and Imogen Heap in the past four hours and staring at colorful pages, I can’t help but wish that I too did not have enough memory.

I’m looking at colorful pages of…. ugly dolls and ugly books. They’re cute but they make me cry, and I don’t quite know why. My scratch disks are full.

I’ve found new homes for the uglies I used to own. They’ve moved on. I like keeping things that mean something to me but a few months ago, I found myself looking at some of them and wondering where they came from. I probably have MCI.

Today though I found myself looking for an ugly doll, and perhaps an ugly book, to buy for my nephew. His birthday is coming up.

I wanted an Ugly Ghost… a Suntan Target… a Ninja Batty Shogun..

Batty Shogun always wondered why toys having nothing to do with Ninjas would add ninja costumes to their line up. Just to look cool? Because Ninjas are rad? Well, Batty Shogun thinks that’s kinda “meh”. See, when Batty Shogun flies around at night with his best pal Ice-Bat, he does up the real dealio in an actual Ninja costume. No red flames, stripes or other crazy decorations. No spelling Ninja with a “Z” at the end. Just straight up stealth mode, that’s how he rolls. No sword though…those are sharp!

Suntan Target? That’s right! Leave him out in the sun for a few months and watch his nice tan fade away! Target has been away on vacation for a while but he just had to come back to show you his nice tan. You would do the same, right? Target is the oldest Uglydoll, so he knows when to show off. ALL THE TIME! Life is to short to hide your suntan! Or other special things, such as talents, special skills, and all that. Do you have one? Target wants to see!

Ugly Ghosts can be found way out beyond the back exits of Uglytown. If you ever decide to go camping near those trees just beyond the gates of the big city, you may be lucky enough to see one! Boo! Boo! Is that some sort of scare tactic or is he trying to tell you his name? Or is it Karaoke night? Hard to tell. But one thing is certain…Ugly Ghosts are good to have around if you can find a way to make friends with them.Try leaving out some sweet snacks under the bed.

These uglies are just adorable. Though I wouldn’t want to keep a lot of them, I think one or two is enough, I like having them for gifts for kids. The kind of kids that watch TV with their arms around their favorite plush.

I totally adore the books too but I wouldn’t want them for myself either. I have this vision of a little library filled with ugly books and little kiddies on the floor, or on colorful miniature tables and chairs, reading, flipping through and talking to each other about the ugly world.

From A is for apple to Z is for zilch, beloved Uglydolls star in hilarious
scenes that teach the alphabet in eye-popping spreads that are unutterably
Ugly—which is to say charming, irreverent, offbeat, and ADORABLE!
Board book for ages 0+

Using trademark Uglydoll irreverence and humor, learning numbers
is a hysterically Ugly proposition with Babo, Ox, Wedgehead, and the
whole Uglydoll contingent!
Board books for ages 0+

First came the alphabet. Then came the numbers. Now Uglydoll cocreators David Horvath and Sun-Min Kim have whomped up their third Ugly Board about—what else? Colors, the full spectrum from red to purple, including the all-important combo, plaid!

And with such books as,
The Ugly Guide to the Uglyverse
The Ugly Guide to Things That Go and Things That Should Go But Don’t
The Ugly Guide to Being Alive and Staying That way
Ugly Guide to Eating Out and Keeping It Down
how I can I not love them?

Them uglies. Things I like but cannot keep.